Michael's Extreme Review #16
October 27, 2009
Rochester, New York
-Well, the Orange Goblin will make his return to TNA. Scott Keith is somewhere dry-heaving. Enough about that, how about Raw last night. Wasn't feeling it, plus, Kyle Busch or Kurt Busch or whoever didn't read his final notes before entering the ring. Kofi Johnston? Really? That wasn't even close. At least Summerfest sounded like a cool idea. Oh, and Ozzy is hosting next week? What's the over/under on how many actual words he gets to say? SHARON!!! Let's get down the ring....
-Nice Yoshi Tatsu opening to hype tonight's ECW Championship Match.
-Ladies and Gentlemen, it's Tony Atlas. "Tonight, Abraham welcome ECW General Manager, Tiffany. And now heeeeeeeeeeeer'es ABE!". Really love his music and so does Atlas as he cuts a rug. Abraham says he is gonna start running his mouth and Atlas nearly shits himself laughing. Out comes Tiffany to new music and Abraham says he has caught a case of jungle fever. Is that racist? I don't think so. Abraham asks why ECW wasn't involved in Bragging Rights. Tiffany has her lines memorized quite nicely this week and says they will be involved next year. As soon as I say that she stumbles all over her words about Sheamus. Sheamus will compete in one last match. Abraham asks how her arm is healing and out comes Regal and Jack-Ov. Regal says he is appealing for his title match one last time. I smell a MEGA run-in tonight with all the fixings! Tiffany says no and Regal is livid! She says he may never receive another ECW title match again. FINE BY ME! Regal busts up Abraham's set and gets blown up turning over the coffee table. So now he screams!
-Welcome Byron Saxton? Jonathan Coachman, you are NOT! Yes he is replacing Matt Striker tonight at the announce table. Wow, he really is yucking it up, Ryan Seacrest-style. I don't know if I can watch the rest of ECW with the sound on now. Let's watch ANOTHER Yoshi Tatsu video.
1. Sheamus vs. Shelton Benjamin
-Shelton is standing by with Savannah. Sheamus' music is playing in the background as Shelton struggles with a promo about Sheamus sneak attacking him. Shelton says tonight Sheamus will have a new-found respect for Shelton Benjamin. Out comes Shelton and fans erupt with Rey Mysterio signs. Shelton starts with a go-behind into a fireman's carry. Sheamus bails. Back in and Sheamus catches him and hammers away at Shelton. Shelton with a bit of a mis-cue and clotheslines Sheamus over the top. Shelton WILL FLY! WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK!
-Welcome back to ECW as Shelton is ramming Sheamus' shoulder into the post. Shelton throws him shoulder-first into the corner. Shelton on the apron and Sheamis tosses him into the ring post. Sheamus on the outside and rams Shelton into the post back-first. Back in and Sheamus pounds on Shelton. Jumping knee to the back of Shelton and now a chinlock applied to Benjamin. Shelton fights out and Sheamus answers. Shelton hits the rope and Sheamus catches him in mid-air and slams him hard for a 2. Hard Irish whip to the corner and Sheamus jumps down across his back and gets 2. Back to the chinlock as the crowd tries to get into it. Shelton up but Sheamus slams him back down. Modified Sleeper on Shelton as Sheamus is sucking in air. Shelton fights out again and catches Sheamus with a overhead suplex. Both men are down. Sheamus up and clubs Shelton hard. Shelton answers and we get the BOO-YEAH spot. Shelton irish whipped and jumps to the top and turns with a nice flying forearm. Shelton with a Stinger Splash. Shelton with a German Suplex and gets 2 and a half. Sheamus with a STIFF boot to the head of Shelton and that will do it (?) @ 10:20. (What a FUCKING weak ending. That was out of nowhere and the crowd was dead. D+, and I hate to do that for a Shelton Benjamin match.)
-ECW goes to commercial just in time for me to catch the LA Lakers get their Championship rings. Nice. ECW title match tonight, if you didn't already know.
-Back on ECW and Rosa Mendes is yapping in Gregory Helms ear. In walks Paul Burchill with Katie Lea. Burchill has a proposition for the Hurricane next week. Now by proposition, does he mean sex? And if so, shouldn't he be talking to...Nevermind.
-Bragging Rights video is aired AGAIN. And yes, ECW was not even involved. Actually Josh Matthews was the only thing that resembled ECW the whole pay-per-view.
-Savannah is backstage with Christian. Christian says that Tatsu actually earned his title shot, unlike some people. *COUGH WILLIAMREGAL COUGH* Man, he really does need Edge or Chris Jericho to make him funny again. Says that tonight, Tatsu will come up short.
MAIN EVENT
ECW CHAMPIONSHIP
2. Christian vs. Yoshi Tatsu
-Champion out first? Here comes Yoshi Tatsu with Conquistador Gold tights. Not a Yoshi-like pop tonight. Lauren Mayhew does the Buffer-like announcing. The ECW Title is bigger than referee Charles Robinson. This ought to be funny watching him hold up the belt. Yep, he is struggling with it. Saxton makes a correlation of Yoshi's gold tights as being a psych-out to Christian. Josh Matthews and I have nothing. A couple of stale-mates off lock ups and finally Yoshi grabs a headlock. Christian now with a headlock. Yoshi sends him off to the ropes, but Christian holds on. Yoshi reverses. Christian escapes and Yoshi hits the ropes and faceplants Yoshi. Sunset flip on Yoshi and Christian gets 2. Yoshi with a backslide, 2. Yoshi goes back to the headlock. Is it me or are they moving kind of slow? Christian attempts to dumps Yoshi outside and he runs back in a schoolboys Christian for 2. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK!
-Welcome back to ECW and Christian still on a headlock. Yoshi sends him to the corner and Christian climbs to the top and Yoshi dumps him to the floor. Yoshi WILL FLY! No sir! Christian moves and runs into the ring. Christian WILL FLY! Replay shows Yoshi landing awkward on his knee. Christian rolls him back in and gets 2. Yoshi thrown into the ropes and hits a cross body for 2. Christian is done messing around and sits him down into a head vice. Yoshi elbows out and Christian no-sells. Inverted DDT on Yoshi gets 2. Christian back to a chinlock with a knee to the back. Yoshi fights out, but Christian throws him into the corner. Tornado DDT attempted and Yoshi throws him off. Yoshi on the top and a jumping spinning heel kick gets 2 and a half. Christian is slobbering and spitting on the canvas, unsanitary. Yoshi with BUZZSAW-LIKE KICKS. Roaring elbow gets 2 and a half. Killswitch attempted and Yoshi kicks him in the back. Christian no-sells and drapes him over the 2nd rope and stands atop his back, Bossman uppercut. Now Christian going up top. Yoshi counters with a rollup and gets 2. Jumping double knee from Yoshi and Christian comes back with another inverted DDT and gets 2. Crowd claps along with Christian. Yoshi gets up and kicks him in the midsection. Yoshi hits his STIFF KICK. 2 and 3/4!!!!!! Yoshi says its over, Christian counters, Killswitch, countered and thrown to the corner. Christian climbs between the ropes and double kicks Yoshi to the head. Christian off the top and hits a turning elbow. KILLSWITCH ENGAGE! That will do it @ 15:34. (Match moved really slow until the final 3 minutes or so. They did a great job teasing falls at the end. C+)
-Out come Jack-Ov and Regal. They obliterate Yoshi and double chokeslam to Christian. Regal picks up the belt and says it's not over. Show ends with Regal holding up the belt.
Final Thoughts...
-What could WWE do to make this show exciting? I don't know, but this wasn't it. I'm starting to sour on the whole state of ECW after tonight as they keep going back to the same feuds and aren't even attempting to start anything new. By default, Sheamus and Shelton's feud ends because Sheamus is headed to RAW. But, where does that leave everyone else? We need more FCW guys moving up or some of the Smackdown and Raw guys get demoted to hone their craft.
As lame as the Shelton/Sheamus match was, at least they didn’t simply forget about their budding feud as Sheamus moves on to Raw. You’re right, though, I hated that finish, even if I recognize that they’re determined to keep Sheamus superhuman-strong. (Why don’t they just let him steal Swagger’s gimmick and promise he’s going to win every match between now and New Year’s?)
I enjoyed the main event, though. I don’t know, maybe I’ve lost it, but it seems like the ECW Title is the only championship in the entire company where the pool of contenders makes some logical sense. And it’s not simply that the roster’s so small–it’s partly because there are no asinine genuflections on behalf of a huge star like Undertaker returning after months away challenging for the title or HBK inserted in the WWE Title picture after tagging with HHH for a couple of months. (For that matter, how were Batista and Rey deserving of a shot at JeriShow’s titles?)
End/rant.
Great report this week!
Nice report! ECW unfortunately is becoming more and more irrelevant including not making it on to PPV at all recently… In a weird way that isn’t a bad thing because ECW is made to look so crap usually on the big shows, at least with ECW there is a chance of a 20 min exciting match between fresh talent.
But the problem is they seem to move up and coming talent way to quickly. As soon as they are a little bit over… boom there on Raw. They moved Swagger and Bourne way to quickly and both don’t seem at the level they were at during their time with ECW. Sheamus’s move came out of no where and really he was only starting to find his groove on the C show.
I dread to think what happens once they lose Christian (no doubt to happen in the next 6 months), it maybe game over and they should just rename the show Tuesday Night Heat.