Michael's Extreme Review#3
-We start with the recap of Christian winning his second ECW Championship.
-We have pyro in High Definition and we welcome you to a 3 hour old ECW taping from Baltimore, Maryland.
1. Tyler Reks vs Paul Burchill (with Katie Lea)
A few words from Reks to begin. Don't mistake him for some laid back surfer dude! Paul Burchill, beware. And ring the bell! Reks works the arm to start. Apparently, Reks attended Cal Poly University. Insert your own joke here. Burchill pulls Reks off the ropes and hits a running senton for 2. Burchill with a body scissors and turns it into a pinning predicament for 2. Burchill with a Spinning Saito Suplex. And thanks to 7-11 we see it again. Abdominal stretch applied by Burchill and Reks turns it into a schoolboy for 2. And here come-a Reks. Reks with a HIGH crossbody and gets 2. Reks on the apron a hits a Springboard Missile Dropkick for the win @ 4:10. (I gotta say this was a little more crisp than their match last week. Kind of a waste of time unless Burchill were to go over. Overall an ok way to start the show, so I give it a C.)
-Tonight Christian vs Zack Ryder.
2. Vladimir Kozlov vs Bill Baine
Baine, a collegiate baseball player, apparently. Does it really matter, at this point? Kozlov starts a big boot and connects with several Al Snow headbutts. Big belly to belly suplex and throws Baine in the corner for some clubberin'. Fall away slam and the Iron Curtain will do it @ 1:19. Here comes Ezekial Jackson dressed, ain't wrestling. Standard staredown, poor Bill Baine. Jackson drills him to the canvas and EJ, out. (Squash match bears no rating. The one-upmanship thing is cool, but for these two, how good can this eventual match be?)
-In the back, we have Tommy Dreamer and Tiffany exchanging pleasantries. In walks Shelton Benjamin following up with Tiffany about being on the Abraham Washington show. She tells Benjamin that A Dub doesn't think he is entertaining enough. Ouch. Gregory Helms interrupts and Shelton makes a Hurricane reference. He says if they want entertaining, they will get it.
3. .24 Karat Productions presents...Sheamus vs Goldust
It sucks that Goldust had to put over all the talent these days. Sheamus starts with a side headlock into a crushing clothesline. Sheamus with a questionable low blow along with a series of elbows for a 2. Sheamus works the neck with a vice and switches over to an armbar. Goldust fights back with an offensive flurry and connects with a deep powerslam for 2. Goldust attempts a Final Cut and Sheamus reverses into a jumping big boot. Chokeslam over the knee *STIFF* for the win @ 5:09. (This was a squash match that went about 4 minutes too long. I can't go any higher than a D.)
- We get a RAW Rebound filled with Shaqfoolery.
- Here comes Christian. Says losing the title was good for him because now he realized how much he needed it. Starts to make fun of Dreamer aaaaaaaaaand WHO HAD TOMMY DREAMER? Dreamer congratulates Christian and says that next week they will meet in a rematch for the ECW Championship. Oh and it will be EXTREME RULES! AND WHO HAD ZACK RYDER? Ryder woo woo woos and that match is next.
4. Christian vs Zack Ryder
And welcome back as we are joined in progress. Christian and Ryder go back and forth working the arm. Christian turns it into a cradle for 2. Ryder is draped over the second rope and Christian muggs for the crowd. Ryder fights back and sends Christian Bret Hart style into the corner. Ryder with a standing chinlock that wears down Christian. Ryder climbs to the 2nd rope and Christian face plants him and gets 2 out of the deal. Ryder goes to the outside and Christian does a 2nd rope dive to the outside. WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK! As we return, Ryder is shoving Christian off the top rope to the floor. Christian back in at 9 and Ryder traps him in a modified abdominal stretch. Ryder turns it into a body scissors. The second one I have seen tonight. Christian turns it for a 2. Christian heads upstairs and Ryder meets him up top with a superplex Ryder rolls on top for a 2 and goes back to work on the ribs. Ryder goes for a 2nd superplex and Christian counters with a high cross body for 2. Christian comes back with a flurry of rights and an inverted DDT for 2. Then he hits a 2nd rope Dropkick then a top rope Dropkick. Attempts a Tornado DDT and Ryder throws him off. Ryder hits a sick flying leg lariat for 2. Ryder measures Christian in the corner for Kevin Nash type violence and runs into a Tornado DDT for 2. Christian misses a charge and eats post. Zack Attack attempted and countered with a snapmare. Flying turning elbow from Christian. Ryder gets up and Christian hits the Killswitch Engage for the win @ 15:34. (Hell of a showing from Ryder and even the announcers put him over. The commercial break took away from this one to the point I wanted to see what had happened during the break. I'll give this one a B+. Almost a borderline A.)
Final Thoughts - I gotta say they need to put Shelton in the ring every week, one way or another. The backstage segment did nothing to help matters and then he didn't even come out to do anything entertaining. I am not also sold on this Sheamus character either. With Kozlov, Jackson, and Sheamus, that gives ECW 3 monster heels. And that is 2 too many. Hopefully next week, Dreamer/Christian will go the whole 2nd half of the show and the fans can get a little nostalgia of the ECW of old.
This is only about 1000% better then last week’s. Kudos.
Still needs personality. If you have friends who are ’smart fans’ then bounce some jokes off of them. Not everything will be funny (trust me, I’ve learned) but it just takes one good joke for people to remember you.
Oh, and come up with signature stuff that’s unique to you. Scott’s had a few over the years (Canadian Violence, Hot Poker up the Ass System, etc). I came up with the WORST MOVE EVER~ and BUT WAIT~!, or strange special stipulations. Here was a gag I thought was funny, from my Extreme Rules review.
“Match #3: Samoan Strap Match
Umaga vs. CM Punk
Special Stipulation: Winner will immediately receive the biggest push in his professional career, starting tonight. Meanwhile, loser must take a piss test for wellness. My, that’s an oddly specific stipulation for a match.”
Just come up with whacky stuff, and remember that if you don’t figure out a way to draw attention and make your stuff stick out, nobody will read it.
I disagree on this one. there are so many people writing reviews that try so desperately to come up with something funny that it gives me a headache.
there are so many approaches to write sth. like this and the comical approach one of it. for example, why not totally dissect the match? analize match parts, moves etc.? or write more of a summary than actual play-by-play? or…., or…., or…. (you get the point
).
If the guy is just looking to be a generic recapper, he wouldn’t be having his stuff posted on Scott’s blog. The kid has potential but straight-laced recappers are a dime a dozen and he could get hired on my any stupid news website just posting shit. If you want attention, you have to have personality and uniqueness to your stuff. Go rants, bitch about stuff, establish running gags, etc. I bet Scott would agree with that.
Michael didn’t submit his reviews to… Wrestleview or some shit… he went to Scott Keith. So he has a great opportunity to get attention for his stuff. But he has to make his columns entirely his, and something that is far from generic. I basically owe Scott my gigs with InsidePulse and Pro Wrestling Press. If you work to get better and make yourself stand out, the *good* websites will hire you. And Michael is good at recapping the matches, but not so good in the personality department. But the potential for improvement is clearly there. I’m trying to help.
Dude, just be yourself…that’s it. People will either like it or hate it.
I’ve got to agree with this comment – I’ve never seen TV reviews ignite such a debate about the author’s writing style. Give the guy a break, it’s only a TV report and it’s not like people are charged money to read it. If people don’t like it then they can read another report – same as if they don’t like Scott’s reviews. If someone is willing to put in the time to write about ECW for the blog then great – more stuff to read and comment on (especially as Scott doesn’t watch the current product regularly).
Anyways, I don’t watch ECW but I’m a fan of WWE using it to introduce new characters. It annoys me that Christian is still on the C-brand though. The guy is in him prime and should be on one of the bigger shows. Raw could certainly do with his talents.
I feel your pain with Christian, as he is my favorite active wrestler, but I understand why he’s on ECW. From a perception standpoint, Vince doesn’t want to take a guy who voluntarily left the promotion three years ago and who was a main-eventer in the “minor leagues” and then bring him back to instantly be involved in main event/upper-mid card programs on one of the top two shows. By Vince leaving him on ECW for his first year or so back, he’s reminding the locker room who butters the bread.
In addition, as evidenced by last night’s match with Ryder, he’s great for working with the young guys and showing them the way, so to speak. Plus, it’s not as if he isn’t being given a strong push and the opportunity to work quality matches almost every week. He’s also getting on every PPV, so finanicially, I’m sure it’s fine for him, too.
Now, if he’s still on ECW after next year’s draft, then I’ll have a real bone to pick with Vinnie Mac…
I hate Vince’s approach on this matters. It doesn’t apply to any other entertainment industry or sports. Christian is a bonnafide main eventer and I think by “teaching him a lesson” or whatever the fuck Vince calls it, he actually is losing steam. Being ECW champ means squat if he goes to RAW (see Swagger) and hopefully he gets moved to Smackdown because i’d love to see him feud with Punk.
Blah…. tell what makes me want to read your report over someone elses on another wrestling site?
There is nothing unique here that says Michaels reports are must read. It is a virtually a play by play review with very little insight.
Also I know you want to seem like you give ‘unique’ ratings by giving A-F grades but just because star ratings aren’t original doesn’t mean they aren’t the best still. Go for star ratings they are more exciting to read, virtually the whole IWC uses them so it is hardly offensive if you do the same.
Again from me thumbs down. I read the ECW reports on 411 they were much better.
My problem with the A-F ratings (which I think is an interesting spin…), is that you need to designate what makes an A and whats an F. Are ratings skewed for TV or is an A an A across the board?
I assume Flair/Steamboat, Hart/Austin, etc are all A’s, maybe even A+’s
So when I see Christian vs Zack Ryder in a ECW main-event getting “a B+. Almost a borderline A,” it leaves me skeptical.
Also, Id say ignore the impulse to throw in whacky stuff. I’d rather see a review of a match that names specific moves, cites when wrestlers begin to sell poorly or when a spot looks stiff. Focus on writing well rather than trying to be quirky. (The humor will flow naturally as you develop, but win us over with substance, not style).
The idea I was going for with the letter grade was to do something different than the normal. Yes, I understand that everybody on the internet uses the star system, but to me, that is Scott’s thing. As far as the rating I gave Christian vs Zack Ryder, I had to take into consideration that it is a tv match. Much like Princess did with the Hardy vs Jericho match from Smackdown. It was no Ricky Steamboat vs Ric Flair, but it was damn good. So if the star system is a better gauge for you guys, I will try it out next week. Thanks for the praise and double thanks for the criticism. That’s the only way I can get better.
I don’t know how you guys got graded in school, but here we used letter grades on report cards. It’s not that hard to understand.
A= 5 Stars
B= 4 Stars
C= 3 Stars
D= 2 Stars
F= 1 Star or Duds
If anything, I think you should drop the + and – parts of your grades, as that can be hard to distinguish. What separates a A+ or an A-? Very little.
I use a similar philosophy for my rating. A lot of people accuse me of overrated matches. My theory is as follows…
* = 20% of the possible score.
In school, anything less then 60% was considered a failed grade.
Thus a match needs at least *** to be a passing grade.
“If anything, I think you should drop the + and – parts of your grades, as that can be hard to distinguish. What separates a A+ or an A-? Very little.”
On the contrary, I think you need the + and -’s for this type of rating. Like in school, there is a big difference between an A, A- and a B+, especially when you are grading something more subjective like essays. (or wrestling) Now the difference between a D and a D+, that may be a little harder to distinguish.
For me:
I think for letter grades you need to consider it like school. Getting an A is for truly exceptional work 4.5 stars or more (A+ would be the rare 5*). An A- would be anything around 4-4.25 stars. Next, a C is perfectly average, inoffensive but unspectacular. Just enough to favorably pass. So if a C = 2.5 stars, you can fill in the rest.
F = 0-.5 Stars
D- = 0.5-.75
D = 1
D+ = 1.25-1.5
C- = 2-2.25
C = 2.5
C+ = 2.75
B- = 3
B = 3.25-3.5
B+ = 3.75
I see nothing wrong with Goldust putting people over. He’s been around forever and has some credibility. I think he’s the perfect step from jobber to actual competition for new guys to feud with/beat.
How about you do wrestling status’s as ratings… to me that sounds like a riot.
For example if a match totally sucks = Ricky Ortiz
If a match is average and has all the fundementals right = Chavo Guerrero
If a match is good but with the wrong person going over = Triple H
If a match rules = Chris Jericho
If a match becomes legendary = Ric Flair.