Yes I’m back. I was going to do a couple of things to make up for the time I missed but it’s been so long now I would just rather start fresh. Plus I DVR’d about four hours of AWA Wrestling off of ESPN Classic this weekend so I might review that for you.
Needless to say SmackDown has changed a ton in a month
-- Edge is gone for six months. Not good because he was just really taking his game to another level, working some terrific mat-based matches.
-- We lost Shelton Benjamin. I’m pissed about this.
-- We gained an out-of-shape but still entertaining Matt Hardy. I don’t think his heel run has much steam because he’s just not good in the ring when carrying matches without bumping. And when did heels stop bumping for faces?
Overall SmackDown is going through a bit of a transition. Jeff Hardy is headed for some time off (allegedly), Rey Mysterio is still struggling with management (allegedly). The Undertaker may or may not come back this year. Umaga is gone. They are doing some silly shit with R-Truth and Jack Swagger or Evan Bourne should have come over to SmackDown in the trade.
So yeah, to say I’m concerned about the future of this brand is accurate. But alas we must go on with the show.
The Princess SmackDown Rant for July 17, 2009
Taped from Miami, Florida.
Hosted by Todd and J.R.
-- Jeff Hardy is headed to the ring to start this week’s PPV build. He has no face paint on which JR notes as his “ever-evolving” look. Ok. Hardy quickly asks for footage from last week’s show when C.M. Punk just buries the shit out of him on the mic – calling him out for being a junkie with two strikes while the straight edged Punk is as clean as a whistle. I’m kinda digging the Punk character these days.
Hardy says everyone makes mistakes and he isn’t hiding behind his. He mentions he hasn’t failed a test in over a year and has never been to rehab – he always heals himself. That’s enough to bring Punk out who sarcastically applauds him for not failing a drug test in a year. Punk calls Hardy a joke and suggests he’s on a path of destruction and maybe hanging out with Punk would have kept him off the drugs and alcohol. Punk asks Hardy who he thinks he is. Hardy says he’s the next champion and Punk calls him a dreamer. Punk is so self-righteous here that Chris Jericho has to be a little jealous.
Punk continues whipping Hardy’s ass verbally until Hardy knocks him out of the ring. Punk decides to be the bigger man and takes a seat at ringside
It’s match time!
Non-Title Match: John Morrison vs. C.M. Punk.
I am happy to report that Morrison is still getting huge face pops. They go through a little wrestling sequence and get into a little shoving match. Both guys do a little side headlock/head scissors spot that leads to nothing. Morrison tries a take down and eventually gets an armbar that Punk breaks with a back elbow. Punk catches Morrison in a modified tarantula but Morrison rolls through a high cross body for two. Dropkick by Morrison gets two. Monkey flip on a counter by Morrison and a clothesline sends Punk over the top. Morrison goes for the baseball kick but Punk pulls him through the rolls and on the floor.
Commercial.
We’re back and a body scissors hold by Punk but Morrison fights out. Back body drop by Punk gets two and a sweet belly-to-belly suplex around gets a near fall. Another body scissors keeps the match on the mat. Punk is working the hold well, adding elbows to the back of Morrison’s head. Morrison breaks the hold again and gets a couple of clothesline. Jumping side kick hits flush but the running knee hits flusher and gets two. Morrison posts Punk and follows with a top-rope frankensteiner that Punk rolls through for two. Double underhook backbreaker by Punk gets too. They exchange foot strikes until Punk catches Morrison in a sleeper. Morrison fights out of the hold and they do a double clothesline spot. Punk misses a blind charge and Morrison hits the springboard jump kick for two. Morrison goes for starship pain but Punk tries to counter into the GTS. Morrison goes for a victory roll and Punk counters for two. Punk goes for the la magistral but Morrison holds it mid-roll and catches Punk’s shoulders down for three!
(Morrison def. Punk, pinfall, ***, no problems with this match but I do feel like they could do better).
-- Promo for Allied Powers DVD. I got it but the match set is eh? I loved the production and the Miz/Morrison hosting was great even if it was outdated and I actually enjoyed the video profiles over any of the matches.
-- Layla comes out as a total face because she is a Miami resident and former Miami Heat dancer. She professes her love for the 305 and goes into a dancing exhibition. But Ricky Ortiz stops the performance in mid-grind to see if he can inspire the crowd…and get some cheap heat by ripping on the Heat. His ‘rally up’ routine is rather cute. This leads nowhere other than Layla dropping Ricky’s rally towel and him looking rather sad.
-- Cryme Tyme does their Word Up spot where Eve Torres informs up that today’s word is championized. MS Word does not think this word exists but the graphic tells me it’s a verb. Game, set and match goes to the graphic! They introduce Antrel Rolle, another Miami resident and current moneymaking NFL player for the Arizona Cardinals. He does a reference to Wrestlemania 26 being held in Phoenix. Jesse a.k.a. Slammaster J comes out and calls Eve his ‘boo’ before getting disposed of. Harmless time killers.
Kane vs. R-Truth. Been a while since we've had a match and I'm hopeful that Pretty Ricky is off the air this week.
R-Truth tries to go toe-to-toe with Kane but only has limited success. Nothing really to note here was Kane does his usual array of punches and boots and forearms. Kane misses a blind charge but dumps Truth over the top rope instead. Truth ducks the big boot and dropkicks Kane out of the ring.
Commercial.
We're back and Kane suplexes Truth to get out of a headlock. Truth tries to speed and hits the back side kick but Kane catches him in a side slam for two. Kane back to the stomps. HARD irish whip sends Truth crashing from the turnbuckle and into a two count. Truth tries to fight out of a resthold but Kane tosses him through the ropes again. Truth counters a slam and sends Kanee into the ring post. Back inside the ring and Kane takes over again and goes with the bearhug this time. Truth slips out and counters a chokeslam with a dropkick. Kane charges but hits elbow. Drop toe hold sends Kane into the buckle. Corner clothesline by Truth and a DDT gets a near fall. Kane misses ANOTHER blind charge so Truth goes to the top and runs into the big boot that knocks him silly.
(Kane def. Truth, pinfall, *1/2, painfully long with a few bright spots but not enough.)
Post-match shenanigans see The Great Khali come out for a confrontation and distracts Kane long enough for Truth to hit a top-rope dropkick that sends Kane packing. Khali is also quite over these days. And good for him. He's still crappy but he's got a presence about him that works for the audience.
-- Ugggh Pretty Ricky. It would be funny...if it were funny, but it's just not.
Mixed Silliness: The Hart Dynasty vs. Cryme Tyme & Eve.
The ladies start off and Natalya slaps around Eve and runs for a tag to Kidd. Kidd tries to match strength with Shad and fails miserably. A nice double team gets a two count but Kidd avoids another big move and the heels take over. Smith in the ring and he hammers JTG a little. Double team gutbuster looks solid and gets two. Kidd tries to build heat with a rest hold and JTG fights out. Kidd makes the tag and JTG makes a lukewarm tag to Eve. Natalya misses a charge and Eve hits a nasty roundhouse kick. A somersault splash gets two until Kidd breaks up the count. All six people scattered around the ring and Natalya hits a hot shot and a spinning lariat for the pin.
(Hart Dynasty def. Cryme Tyme/Eve, pinfall, *1/2, never got going as the match needed a hot tag to Gaspard to come together a little better)
-- Maria catches Dolph Ziggler doing some pushups and kisses his bicep before wishing him good luck. Ok.
-- Interview with Edge: He says he's been in the business for a long time and mentions his accolades.He hints that the injury could be in the end of his career. This build to the Jericho match as Wrestlemania is already great. Edge explains how difficult the torn achilles will be to overcome but he is going to do everything he can. When asked about Jericho, Edge starts his explanation and right on cue Jericho's music starts.
Jericho calls Edge a pathetic excuse for a human being and cracks on his pleas for sympathy. Jericho will not be punished by his selfish actions and promises to find a partner at Night of Champions that will be better than him in every way. Jericho accuses Edge of politicking to win every championship he's won and calls his most impressive list of his career is his injuries. Ouch. Jericho has never been injured because he's too strong. Well with the exception of the broken arm in SMW, but who's counting.
Edge will use Jericho's words as his motivation and if he comes back....WHEN he comes back he will prove Jericho wrong.
-- Main Event Time!
Chris Jericho & Dolph Ziggler vs. Rey Misterio & Jeff Hardy.
Misterio-Ziggler for the Intercontinental title at Night of Champions is now official. And C.M. Punk is going to join us for the match.
Jericho and Hardy start the match and Hardy quickly has Jericho reeling with a dropkick and his springboard corner baseball kick. Jericho counters a head scissor and knocks Hardy from the ring with a springboard dropkick.
Commercial.
We're back and Ziggler is hammering on Hardy. Super flying elbow gets two we're off the the land of restholds. Dolph does his chinlock with tons of enthusiam -- but it's really just a chinlock. He adjusts it into a cool looking headlock thing and eventually just tosses Hardy drop. Tag to Jericho who arrogantly pushes Hardy around and drops him with a clothesline. A follow-up fist drop gets a two count. Hardy bounces over a slam and gets knocked down by a flying lariat. Hot tag to Misterio. Springboard sitdown splash and a high cross body gets two. Top rope hurricanrana gets two. Misterio with a sunset flip and a kick to the head for two. Jericho and Misterio are on fire with their chemistry. Another springboard hurricanrana sets up the 619 but Ziggler makes the blind tag. Misterio hits the move and Ziggler dumps Misterio as he goes for the West Coast Pop. Ziggler back to the chinlock for a second but he whips Misterio into the corner face first and gets a two count. Ziggler tries it again and Misterio blocks it and send Ziggler into the post. Second hot tag to Hardy. Big clothesline, inverted atomic spot and the double leg drop to the sternum gets two. Jericho misses a clothesline but the Whisper in the wind hits for two. Hardy goes for the head scissors but Jericho gets the walls instead. Hardy counters it, twist of fate and a swanton should be all but Ziggler breaks the count. We're on the floor and Hardy sends Jericho into the area where Punk was sitting. Punk returns the favor and gets Jericho disqualified.
Misterio takes offense to Punk's actions long enough for Ziggler to hit him with a baseball slide and a reverse STO on the floor (he needs a name for that move). Jericho tosses Hardy into the ring and hits the codebreaker and locks on the walls as Punk emotionlessly looks on.
(Misterio/Hardy def. Jericho/Ziggler, disqualification, ***1/4. Not bad at all but again, it could have been better).
The Bottom Line: Not a bad show at all but SmackDown shouldn't be "not bad" it should be very good but the roster attrition is really starting to show.
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`Tags: Chris Jericho, DVD, Edge, House, Intercontinental title, Jeff Hardy, Lost, Matt Hardy, Miz, MMA, Shelton Benjamin, Smackdown, Sting, Umaga, Undertaker, Wrestlemania
I saw the opening segment between Hardy and Punk and I have to admit that I was into Punk’s burial of Hardy, he came off really well. Now if he could just get a better finisher and less wussy haircut we’d be somewhere. I also think his tattoo’s are really lame. But I’m coming around. A little.
The straight edge gimmick is better suited to a heel I think.
Is there any actual point to the Pretty Ricky bullshit? It’s bad enough Truth is annoying me with “WHAT’S UP?” every damn time he comes to the ring.
I hear ya. I understand comedy is generally thought of as a subjective medium; but with “Pretty Ricky” i’m just dumbfounded that someone got paid to write that and Vince/Steph actually thought it was funny enough to make the air. Simply amazing.
Sorry to diverge a bit…. on the Allied Powers DVD
“I got it but the match set is eh? I loved the production and the Miz/Morrison hosting was great even if it was outdated and I actually enjoyed the video profiles over any of the matches.”
I too thought the match selection was a bit random, and the whole big movie production was cute… but I HATED Miz/Morrison’s hosting. They sounded stilted, awkward, and worst of all, exactly the same. These two are supposed be some of WWE’s young personalities, but you couldn’t tell from the way they spoke.
Watching the DVD, one of WWE’s big flaws emerged. Most of the younger talent either dont know their characters well, don’t embody their character’s gimmick, or are just really bad at promos. I also hated how they would mercifully mock somebodies mullet or outfit, then do a 180 and get all serious about how the Rockers really influenced them as kids. They needed to turn up the dick-attitude, turn down the fan-boy nonsense (like the Freebird dance) and practice speaking their lines so they sound like original thoughts, and not just a talking head.
“They needed to…practice speaking their lines so they sound like original thoughts, and not just a talking head.”
Yes, that is the absolute worst. On the last 3 DVDs we’ve had the thrill and privilege of Tazz, Striker & Maria, and Miz & Morrison fucking READING to us. Through the whole 9 hour deal. I can’t even begin to describe how annoying this is. Why can’t they just drag out Mean Gene’s walking corpse for these things? He at least knows how to bring a bit of class and dignity to the retarded shit that they make him say.
I will be in the minority here, but I love Mark Henry and I’m really enjoying his recent run as a good guy.
And Chris Jericho has been on fire. The WWE gets major props for making the tag team titles seem important. He just creamed DiBiase and Rhodes in hilarious fashion.
How did Jericho end up back on Raw? I thought he got traded to SmackDown? I’m just wondering.
For my money Jericho is the best thing about wrestling right now and has been since WrestleMania 24.
The Unified Tag champs can go where they please.
I think.
Ok, I was just wondering. The whole brand split gets dumber by the minute. I wish they just put everyone back under the WWE banner. It at least made sense with split PPVs but now it’s just a joke. They can keep ECW seperate as a development league but one world title I think would help a lot. It would boost the number of main eventers for one…it would eliminate the Orton/HHH/Cena never-ending merry go round. I would hope.
8,935 verse, same as the first. Seriously, the brand split has been esplained to you a billion times. Why not complain about it raining for a while?
Dude, I hate the rain. Whats your point?
That its gonna rain anyway.
How ’bout those ZZ Top segments last night huh? Those WWE writers can really write comedy~!!!
I like Mark Henry too.
He’s done very well with his unbeatable monster heel (who almost always gets beaten) gimmick the past few years and I remember his face run and his early heel NOD run fondly as well.
I used to always like he and D-Lo as a team too.
He is kind of slow so if you don’t enjoy anything short of a break neck pace he’s definitely not going to be your cup of tea and he’s never going to be the guy to lead the company but as part of the ensemble so to speak he’s great.
Timing (and birth) is everything. If he had this look in the mid 80s he surely would’ve gotten a program with Hogan.
Dolph Ziggler really needs a new finisher. That jumping reverse…whatever he does looks pretty stupid.
Speaking of Raw, did anyone hear Cena’s pop when the show opened? Haven’t heard a reaction that big since HHH’s return in January 2002. Amazing.
It was a huge pop, no doubt, but after his lame promo you could literally hear crickets. I don’t know if it’s his delivery or the material, but his promos are cringe inducing.
Lol that’s true. I’m a big fan but his promos are hit and miss. He usually delivers when he needs to though.
As for the show itself, it seems the running theme of Raw in 2009 is to suck as much heat out of its heels as possible. I can’t remember the last time Legacy stood tall at the end of the show. Jericho got manhandled by Henry, Miz was lumped with the Mickie-Maryse feud and Swagger became just another mid-carder. Punk must be thanking his lucky stars that he’s on Smackdown.
Why are they ignoring Swagger? He had good heat in a decent match vs Cena on the draft Raw. His interview segment with MVP had some heat. I wish they would push any midcarder to the top.
Cena’s promos veer wildly off course when he mugs for the camera or tries to be funny. I didn’t see the promo last night but the one a couple weeks ago when he mugged to the camera right in front of Orton was the dumbest shit I had seen in a while. Why wouldn’t Orton just smack Cena in the back of the head? They’ve turned Cena into that annoying ‘needs to be the center of attention’ guy that no one really likes.
Totally with you guys on Swagger. After his dayview in which he suplex the shit out of Orton and then let him win by count out, I thought they were going to put him into Legacy as an enforcer type and maybe push the faction. Instead, Dibiase and Rhodes continue to be jokes and Swagger has already been lost in the shuffle.
Another thing about the Miz. I want to be clear that i’m not a fan of his in ring work that much, but he’s green still so I understand. However, he created tons of heat on his own in the “feud” with Cena only to get punked hard and be thrown into a women’s feud.
Did he do something backstage that someone knows about? Man, they really can’t elevate anyone on RAW can they?
I wouldn’t say Miz is all that green. He has been wrestling since 2003.
My thoughts on Jesse,
Well, it worked with John Cena.
Cena wasn’t played as a complete wigger though.
Dude, for future reference: no.
I like Jesse, but he’s no John Cena.
Doesn’t have the look or the size or the presence.
That shit was weak. I think that’s the worst Guest GM stuff yet.
That was the only part of the show that I watched.